Once upon a time there was a young girl of 16 who became friends with a young boy of 17. She was innocent and naive and took words at face value - because why would anyone feel the need to lie about love, friendship and feelings? So they moved on from friendship to dating, from dating to early pending parenthood and subsequent marriage. A bride at 18, a mom at 19, she was in love and just knew that the rest of her life was a blessing in the making. She closed her ears to the words of those who would say negative things about her groom, and everyone seemed to be inclined to give an opinion that wasn't to her liking. She put her fingers in her ears and spent the next 22 years with the sounds of lalalalala in her head to tune out the truth that those who truly loved her were trying to get her to hear.
Things were wonderful in her sunshine world of blind and deaf adoration and ignorance. She loved her daughter and her son with all of her heart and knew that life was bliss. The signs were all around her that not all was as it should be, but rather than see it she focused on the things that were good - and there were many things that were. The family times with the four of them were wonderful. Playing with the children, holidays and the traditions they created, the little trips they took. They did create memories that were pleasing to all of them. But always on the edge of her world was the grey cloud that she pretended wasn't there, but that grew darker with time, and which inevitably would burst a storm onto her world.
Sure enough, their daughter grew up and moved on with her life, embarking on adventures on her own. Their son was getting near to that point as well. The woman, still blinded to what was going on in her own life, still heard the sound of happy thoughts drowning out the unhappy ones. She worked hard, commuting long hours to and from work, 5 per day in all! She made excuses for why her prince couldn't keep a job for any length of time, and why he just couldn't get along with others on the job - it was always someone else's fault. It had to be! He said it was so, so it must be. He kept her from questioning his whereabouts and who his friends were with harsh words and name calling, and she did her share of giving back as good as she got. They were experts at hurting each other by this point in their lives, but still she lalalala out the bad and just knew that once this stress, or that stress, went away that life would be perfect again. It didn't matter that by now her self-esteem had been beaten to a pulp, her confidence was crushed, and she depended completely on him for any positive affirmation - which was never forthcoming.
One day the grey clouds burst and the storm rained down. He was leaving her. He said he was unhappy, but it was him - not her. No, there wasn't anyone else. He'd been faithful, he had! And because he had said it, then it must be true. She looked to herself, blaming herself for not working hard enough, not being pretty enough, not being good enough . . . though the voices of her family said otherwise. Eventually the truth did come out. There was someone else. Had been for quite awhile. And she wasn't the only one. There were many, some of them friends of hers, some not. It had started not long after they had gotten married and continued through the entire 22 years. The lies and the secrets had compounded all while the chorus of lalalalala played in her head. The voices of the family had been speaking the truth all those years, while the verbal, mental and emotional abuse created layers of scars that would take years to peel away.
The woman, who set out on a new life now had her eyes opened to the truth that had been all around her for her entire grown-up life. And she set out on an adventure of her own. She met a real man with no pretense of being a prince. He had honor, integrity and wisdom. He had a quiet authority that radiated strength of spirit, mind and body. He fell in love with her, and she with him, and a world such as she'd never experienced before opened up her eyes to what a joy life could be. She learned that two people can speak the truth to each other and be happy without lies. She learned that it was wonderful not to be called hateful, vile names daily. She learned that it was true happiness when two people worked together as a team, rather than one person working and the other taking. Life wasn't perfect, life never is, there are disagreements, sometimes even arguments, but underneath it all is love, dedication and truth. Her adventure continues with the real man of her dreams, and she anticipates that life will be good and any bumps on the road will be traveled with balance and support from one to the other.
And they anticipate living happily ever after . . .
Oh, and a sidenote - evil continues to perpetuate evil, and bring sadness and mayhem into the lives of all to whom it is connected. Listen to the voices of truth and let not the lalalala of the fairy tale song drown them out.
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